Episode 24 - Laura Natoli's Journey from Best Friends to Business Partners

[00:00:00] It is Libby with Fearlessness. What is Fearlessness? It's that underlying grit that empowers you to forge ahead.

[00:00:05] Even when hope seems distant, it's the courage to walk through those fires of hell knowing that

[00:00:10] we're going to come out not just stronger on the other side but better. Stay tuned and learn how

[00:00:16] to get Fearlessness. I'm your host Libby DeLucien and I want to welcome everybody to the show,

[00:00:22] to this episode, and we have a great guest today. Laura if you want to go ahead and

[00:00:26] introduce yourself. Yeah absolutely. My name is Laura Natoli. I co-own a cleaning business on

[00:00:32] Long Island in New York with my best friend since birth and we've been in business for about

[00:00:39] a little over six years at this point and it's been just such a journey. I never thought that

[00:00:44] I would be a business owner. If you told five-year-old me that I don't have business one day,

[00:00:48] I would say you were crazy. So it's definitely been a journey and an experience but I'm really

[00:00:54] loving it. Awesome. So tell me a little bit about, I just interviewed Holly last week so you guys

[00:01:03] could catch that episode. That's her business partner but I want to learn more about how you

[00:01:08] said that you've been best friends from birth. Is that right? Have you really known each other

[00:01:13] that long? Yep so when I say best friends since birth, I mean literally crawling around

[00:01:18] the floor in diapers before we were even one years old. It's so funny and I really do think

[00:01:24] it's a fate situation because our parents knew each other and were friends in Brooklyn and

[00:01:30] they both lived in Brooklyn, New York and our brothers went to elementary school together

[00:01:34] and our parents became friends. A lot of the moms were very cliquey so they kind of flocked

[00:01:38] to each other and we would have play dates literally as you know six-month-year-olds,

[00:01:45] crawling around the floor and my parents moved out to Long Island when I was about one year old

[00:01:51] and two years later her parents bought a house three blocks away by coincidence.

[00:01:58] That's cool. So what made you, have you owned a business before owning this business with your

[00:02:03] best friend? No I have never owned a business before. I actually studied acting in college

[00:02:10] and she studied journalism so it's definitely not something I ever thought I'd be doing.

[00:02:15] So what made you guys partner? What made you guys want to partner first and then we'll talk

[00:02:21] about why you chose the business you chose? That's a great question. I feel like we've

[00:02:27] always known that we wanted to do something together. You know even when we were say

[00:02:33] around 10 years old, we would have clubs and she would be the owner and I would be the

[00:02:37] president. We've always you know wanted to work together in some aspect but we had different

[00:02:43] passions and she actually was the one that said let's start a cleaning business and I was very

[00:02:49] reluctant. I said I don't want to be cleaning houses for the rest of my life because at

[00:02:53] that point I didn't even know that Mop Free was something that could be possible so I was

[00:02:59] very reluctant for a couple of years and then one day I said you know what let's just do it

[00:03:04] and it started off as a little side hustle to earn extra money and one thing spiraled into

[00:03:10] another and we ended up blowing up due to word of mouth. It kind of just happened to us if that

[00:03:17] makes sense. Yeah absolutely I think that that's how a lot of times you stumble upon something

[00:03:23] that you're good or great at or you enjoy and it's purely by accident or chance.

[00:03:29] And then the passion develops from there, from the mastery the more you learn the more

[00:03:34] you develop the passion and the more you want to master it and it's just this evolving cycle.

[00:03:42] How long did you guys clean in the field together? Oh my goodness we were cleaning

[00:03:46] in the field together up until I would say we weren't fully Mop Free until about six months

[00:03:53] ago so we were cleaning for almost the full first six years. And for our listeners who don't know what

[00:03:58] Mop Free is, Debbie Sardon she owns Debbie Sardon is she's known as the Mop Free millionaire

[00:04:05] so she's a coach and a consultant and her mission is to like get owner cleaners Mop Free. So we

[00:04:11] use the term Mop Free for maybe other industries or cleaning industries that aren't familiar yet

[00:04:18] with that term but that's ultimately the goal that we all want to be Mop Free because we

[00:04:21] start many of us as owner-operators and then we go from there. What would you say

[00:04:28] is the biggest challenge owning a business with your best friend?

[00:04:32] Oh that's another good one. And she could listen. I know she actually is in the other

[00:04:37] room and she said she was gonna eavesdrop so I better be careful with my words.

[00:04:42] Honestly we're really blessed in that Holly and I have the same core values deep down

[00:04:46] and we want the same things and have the same goals in mind for the business and for

[00:04:50] life in general. So we're very lucky that we don't bed heads often and when we do we

[00:04:56] talk through them, we vocalize those concerns but I would say the main challenge for us was

[00:05:01] establishing role clarity because for the longest time we did not have our roles established

[00:05:06] and I don't think it was until I think last April was when we really sat down and say okay

[00:05:11] you're going to do the marketing and the scheduling and I'm gonna do the sales and the

[00:05:15] hiring and that has really helped us a lot because I feel like not knowing who takes

[00:05:21] ownership of each role is really been the hardest part for us. Yeah because if everyone's

[00:05:27] in charge no one's in charge. Yeah and then a lot of things get left behind and not done.

[00:05:32] So if you're struggling with your office structure, I mean just had a coaching call

[00:05:36] the other day with someone who's like overwhelmed and I said let's talk through

[00:05:39] your accountability chart or org charter you know whatever you want to call it. People call

[00:05:42] it different things, they are kind of different but similar and he's like I don't have one.

[00:05:48] I said well that's a great place to start is role clarity. The lack of role clarity could be

[00:05:55] causing chaos, miscommunication, misalignment, dropped balls like things falling through the

[00:06:01] cracks so you know I love that. So what was the biggest challenge? What would you say is

[00:06:08] the biggest reward about having a business with your best friend?

[00:06:13] I could go on for days honestly. We're so lucky and I gotta hand it to the people that go into

[00:06:18] business with their spouse. I feel like that is so challenging and I could never do that

[00:06:23] whereas so many people say they could never go into business with the best friend but I

[00:06:26] feel like just getting to be with each other every day and spend time with each other

[00:06:31] is honestly the best reward that I have for myself because if again if you would have told

[00:06:37] me at 10 years old that I would have run a business I would have said you're crazy

[00:06:40] but if you said oh you get to work with Holly every single day I would have been so

[00:06:45] ecstatic. So just getting to spend that quality time with her and knowing she always has my

[00:06:49] back in any situation is the biggest reward in my opinion. That's awesome, I love that. I

[00:06:55] feel the same way about working with my husband every day. It's so many couples whether you're

[00:07:02] a spouse or a partner or just a business partnership struggle when it comes to working

[00:07:08] with a partner or spouse and for me it's with my first marriage it was an immense struggle.

[00:07:15] We talked about I talked about that and oh no it wasn't this podcast, I was a guest on

[00:07:19] another podcast. But with this with my current husband it's been nothing but a reward but I

[00:07:26] entered it from a place of caution because I knew how it was before. I had experienced

[00:07:33] the chaos and the horror of working with a spouse when it didn't work

[00:07:38] or a partner and so I made sure that when I did it this time I did it differently and I did

[00:07:43] it more transparently with higher level of communication and with role clarity.

[00:07:51] I feel like that's the biggest thing. It is huge and so many couples that go into business

[00:07:58] with each other whether like again best friends or partners marriage spouses I don't think there's

[00:08:04] any difference in how you approach it and the level of expectations that are needed

[00:08:09] and how organized things need to be. It's all the exact same it's just understanding that before

[00:08:15] you go in. I told somebody the other day she had had family come work for her and I told her

[00:08:22] she needs to stop hiring family because they're taking advantage of her. Like the books were

[00:08:28] off and these things and then but she had another family member that wanted to come

[00:08:32] work for her and I said unless you can hold your family member accountable,

[00:08:36] unless you can have a difficult conversation with them, unless you can fire them don't hire

[00:08:41] your family member or your friends because that's when you start to get apathy for

[00:08:47] your business and you start to hate your business and it gets out of control and turns

[00:08:51] into something that you don't even know what it is anymore and it's gotten just a little

[00:08:56] bit out of hand. So love your feedback on that. I'm totally totally in line.

[00:09:03] You know so let's talk about like role clarity and you know feeling like overwhelmed or

[00:09:12] challenged. What's the best piece of advice that you could give

[00:09:17] you know that struggling entrepreneur when they're feeling overwhelmed?

[00:09:23] What do you do? I take some time for myself and play some video games and relax and

[00:09:29] decompress when I'm feeling overwhelmed. To be honest but I feel like the best piece of advice

[00:09:36] would be to take time for self-care and that's gonna look really different for a lot of people.

[00:09:42] Like I said for me it's sitting down and playing some video games. For some people

[00:09:46] it's going to get a pedicure or going to the nail salon at the hair salon you know.

[00:09:51] Yeah I don't go to the nail salon. Yeah as you can see. But I do do other things.

[00:09:55] What would you say your self-care is? Like what do you do for self-care?

[00:10:00] So I have a morning routine that I really try to stick with and I try to do it every morning.

[00:10:04] So I have a morning date with my husband. We're on date like number 270 something. I can't remember.

[00:10:12] I count in my calendar and so that is part of my self-care. So a lot of people think

[00:10:19] self-care is like oh I have to put myself first or I have to go shopping or that's

[00:10:24] selfish. But self-care if you really start to understand it and learn it, it's whatever you

[00:10:29] need as a person, business owner, female, woman, mother, entrepreneur, you name it.

[00:10:37] What you need to feel balanced in your life. I wouldn't say what you need to feel

[00:10:44] to feel control because we'll never have control over everything. So just let's not

[00:10:50] think that we can control it. But what we need to feel balanced.

[00:10:56] I learned this actually a while ago from a psych in therapy. I was in therapy and if you're

[00:11:01] an adult and you haven't been to therapy, I really highly recommend every adult should

[00:11:05] go through therapy whether you have something wrong with you or not so that you can talk

[00:11:08] about things because we all have issues. The therapist said to me, I have to put myself

[00:11:17] first. I was like wow that's really selfish but the first thing that went to mind was

[00:11:25] the women that you see out shopping and getting their hair done every week.

[00:11:30] That was just my misconception of reality. So I started to learn to put myself first and

[00:11:36] it was what are the things I needed to do to be grounded, to be a great mom,

[00:11:40] to be a great wife, to be a great sister or daughter to my parents.

[00:11:47] Mind change all the time but again I do like a morning date with my husband every morning,

[00:11:53] simple cup of coffee. It's like 30 or 45 minutes we set aside for each other.

[00:11:58] We typically walk but this morning it was raining so we

[00:12:01] went in the hot tub and we planned our summer vacation.

[00:12:04] I also make time to exercise every morning and make time for either yoga or some light

[00:12:14] meditation so I can just get my head straight. So many people try and it is hard to do

[00:12:21] meditation and I will say I'm not mastered it but I've been doing it for like 10 years

[00:12:29] and I'm just getting to where I can clear my mind. So it takes practice.

[00:12:35] Doing those things, exercising, trying to make a little time for either reading or learning,

[00:12:39] just light reading or learning are those things that I need so I don't even typically start

[00:12:44] working until about 10 a.m. because I try to get all these things done but when I'm ready

[00:12:50] to work because I took the self-care of what I needed to feel balanced and kind of head

[00:12:56] cleared, I can work at a very high rate or high capacity when I start at 10.

[00:13:06] And so it does sound selfish like oh I don't start working till 10 but when I also work,

[00:13:12] sometimes I work later, sometimes I stop at 3, sometimes I work till midnight,

[00:13:15] you don't know but when I get those things done it is a great way for me to start the

[00:13:21] day with me in control of myself. Yeah and that's probably why you're so efficient and

[00:13:28] you are so good at getting things done because you took that time in the morning to grow and

[00:13:33] to focus on you. Yes and then I found the mornings were the way I could be consistent

[00:13:38] because I have children, we have businesses, if we put it off till the evening or the afternoon

[00:13:43] I found that I never got it done ever. It's like I let excuses happen but if I start before

[00:13:50] the day even wakes up, before the world wakes up, not the day, then I have no excuse.

[00:13:57] Right. I gotta try that. I like that morning day idea. I've seen on Facebook the morning

[00:14:02] dates and I'm like I gotta try that. Yeah so it's something that I didn't get the idea,

[00:14:09] I did not create the idea, the original idea. I got it from a friend who I'm in a mastermind

[00:14:16] group with and he just does them once in a while. I took it to the extreme so we're on

[00:14:24] 271-273, date number 273. I just marked them in my calendar so I'm a loser.

[00:14:33] No I think it's cute, I think it's awesome. But they have changed so much for

[00:14:39] just my relationship with my husband. It is our time for us to have fun with each other,

[00:14:44] to brainstorm, to innovate. Not even like business just like we planned our summer

[00:14:48] trip or summer time off when school's out. We plan what do we want to do or future ideas

[00:14:55] or projects with the kids or ourselves because when do you get to that stuff if you don't set

[00:15:01] clear time aside to really focus on you and that person? It doesn't just happen

[00:15:08] because if we keep saying oh we'll do it later, later never comes.

[00:15:12] Yeah that's true. Yes so love it. So self-care is huge.

[00:15:22] As far as kind of lessons being learned in business, first business you're six years in,

[00:15:29] you've made it past that what was that statistically like 99% of businesses fail

[00:15:34] in the first year and like some astronomical within the five years.

[00:15:39] So you've made it to six years so you're out of those humps. What would you say is

[00:15:46] like the most valuable lesson that you've learned in your six years?

[00:15:52] There's so many. I could sit here and talk to you all day about the lessons I've learned

[00:15:56] and the mistakes I've made but I feel like the biggest lesson I've learned is

[00:16:01] a that it's okay to say no whether that be to clients, to employees, to you know

[00:16:07] co-workers, business partners and also to be okay with not being liked by everyone

[00:16:15] because I feel like I grew up a people pleaser through and through and when I started off

[00:16:19] this business the things that I said yes to when it comes to our clients, I mean that's

[00:16:25] a whole other podcast topic but the things that I've said yes to and that I've done

[00:16:30] you know just to not upset somebody, make somebody mad. It's insane so I'm really and

[00:16:37] I'm still working through this. I have not mastered this in any way especially when it

[00:16:40] comes to the employees because I always wanted to be that boss I never had. I wanted to be

[00:16:45] there when I first started off in business. I thought that I could be a friend to my employees

[00:16:49] which I quickly learned is not a good way to be a leader and a boss at all. So I

[00:16:54] have changed that but I do still feel like I have an issue where I make everybody else's

[00:16:59] feelings my problems and I want to be you know I want to be the boss that they like and I

[00:17:05] still struggle with that a lot so I'm learning and I am improving in this aspect but I still

[00:17:10] have a long way to go. What are some advice you can give to our listeners

[00:17:17] that help that helps you get through that feeling of it's okay to say no. Like what are some

[00:17:25] things or thought processes you go through for yourself that's helped you get gotten better

[00:17:30] at saying no? I feel like it just comes down to practice. You have to force yourself to do

[00:17:35] it and get really comfortable with being uncomfortable and the first few times you say

[00:17:41] no you're like oh everything's fine I didn't die the world didn't explode everything's fine

[00:17:47] and then you get really good at it and there are things now especially when it comes to our

[00:17:50] policies and procedures with clients that I say no or I set the rules from the get-go

[00:17:57] without even thinking twice where four years ago I would have never dreamed about putting

[00:18:01] these policies in place or saying no to the client so I really think just the repetition

[00:18:05] the practice is the best way to go about doing that. That's awesome for me it was

[00:18:12] to start with just being conscious of it like just knowing that I say like yes to everything

[00:18:23] and to start paying attention to what am I saying yes to and so have just just being

[00:18:31] conscious say do I say yes to everything or do I say no and start tracking it and the one

[00:18:37] statement that stuck with me for a long time was that every time I say yes to something I'm

[00:18:41] saying no to something else and what is that something else that I'm saying no to?

[00:18:49] That's good. I never thought about that. What is it? Is it your kids? Is it your husband?

[00:18:53] Is it your wife? Every time you say yes to something you're saying no to something else

[00:18:57] so what's that something else? Is it yourself? Is it self-care? Is it your kids soccer game?

[00:19:03] Is it dinner with your wife like I said? Is it the business? Is it those to-dos we should be

[00:19:09] doing but we're avoiding because we don't want to do them? That's what I found myself saying

[00:19:14] yes because I'm like oh I don't want to do the non-fun stuff. Yeah I think tracking them

[00:19:21] is a really good idea I've never thought about that. Tracking them and just really

[00:19:26] being observant to what are you saying yes to and what are you saying no to and are you

[00:19:30] saying yes to more things than you're saying no to. Now there's a fine line because you know

[00:19:35] when you're trying to make it in the world you want to say yes to everything. We hear

[00:19:40] people say that but you want to say yes to all the opportunities not yes to everything

[00:19:44] and that's a difference. Yeah and it's also why are you saying yes? Are you saying yes

[00:19:50] because this is something that you want to do or that will level you up? Are you saying

[00:19:54] yes because you feel bad for the other person that asked you? Yeah or are you saying yes

[00:19:59] because you're a people pleaser? And that's I think the big one for a lot of people.

[00:20:05] Yeah that's where a lot of us struggle with. Yeah so you know reflecting on your journey

[00:20:12] in the last six years what would you say that you could share with us that you know through

[00:20:19] this whole you know having a business with your best friend, being an owner cleaner in the field

[00:20:25] because that sucks. I've done that. You know what is some advice you could give our listeners

[00:20:32] that helps keep you motivated? Like during challenging times how do you stay motivated?

[00:20:40] I'm still trying to figure that one out myself honestly because I feel like I do go

[00:20:43] through lulls and I go through dips where I'm like we got this we're gonna grow and then

[00:20:47] I go through periods where it feels like I keep saying to Holly my business partner

[00:20:52] it feels like we're trudging through quicksand to grow. It feels like we're pushing a boulder

[00:20:58] up a hill so it's hard to keep that motivation. I feel like a good way to do so is tracking

[00:21:05] everything and going back and looking at your numbers and seeing you know I feel like we're

[00:21:09] not growing as fast as I want to be but then I go back and I look at our numbers and our

[00:21:14] snapshots and our bookings and leads from a year ago and I'm like wow numbers don't lie.

[00:21:19] We really have grown and you know keeping track of all that really keeps me

[00:21:24] motivated to keep going but also just leaning on people, leaning on your circle when you

[00:21:29] are feeling that way you need to talk about it if you know if you're feeling unmotivated

[00:21:34] you can't just do in that alone you need to talk to you know your business partner you

[00:21:38] need to talk to. I love to meet up with other cleaning business owners that are in my area

[00:21:43] and get together and really just say hey man I'm feeling stuck can you give me some advice.

[00:21:48] So I think that that's really the biggest piece of advice I can give. Lean onto your

[00:21:52] circle and make sure that your circle is full of people that support you and want to see you

[00:21:56] grow and want to see you succeed. Yes, I love that. I think for me when I feel like

[00:22:02] a little discouraged or I always look at the consistency of you know okay maybe I don't feel

[00:22:10] like my numbers are any better but like how consistent have we been with like

[00:22:16] releasing podcasts or releasing videos or making updates to softwares or you know the

[00:22:23] consistency is what creates the momentum for growth and I think with social media and just

[00:22:31] the access to everybody's information at our fingertips it's so easy to get discouraged

[00:22:36] because you're like why could they grow so fast why could they do so much but we don't see like

[00:22:41] the 10 years of struggle before they achieve that. We don't see the 15 years of them making

[00:22:47] a video every day for 15 years like MrBeast is a great example like you do not see

[00:22:53] the consistency he had for years before he was famous. Yeah that's a great example and I think

[00:23:00] it's easy to get so unmotivated and off track because we see growth in other people faster than

[00:23:08] we see it in ourselves but just remember like you don't know what was behind those years

[00:23:13] of experience or consistency or the cadence of what they did to get there because I don't think

[00:23:19] anyone is a success overnight. I just think it looks like it or we think it is.

[00:23:25] Yeah it's true it's really easy to compare and on social media everyone's posting their highlight

[00:23:30] reels they're not posting themselves you know struggling out in the field you know running to

[00:23:35] interviews in their sweatpants because they had to clean all day you know those things are

[00:23:39] people are not showing you those those behind-the-scenes stories on social media

[00:23:44] you're only seeing the best of their life and the best of their growth and their business

[00:23:48] for the most part. Absolutely it's a highlight reel. Yeah.

[00:23:53] So knowing what you know now what would you tell the younger version of yourself?

[00:24:03] Like young young or like first start in the business?

[00:24:08] Anything you can pick anything. What would you tell the younger version of yourself?

[00:24:12] What advice would you give yourself so that you could skip some mistakes or make it easier

[00:24:19] on yourself? I would tell my younger self to just go for it. Just go for it just lean into it

[00:24:28] in all aspects you know I mean I feel like you know growing up you have this idea of what your

[00:24:35] life is going to look like and what you're going to do when you get older and you know

[00:24:38] how your story is going to go but I really believe the saying you know man makes plans

[00:24:43] and God laughs so I would tell my younger self just to you know go for it in terms of the business

[00:24:53] because like I said I was very reluctant for a while even when my best friend said let's start

[00:24:57] a business let's start a business I said no so many times before I said yes went deep down

[00:25:01] I'm so happy now that I said yes so don't let fear or misconception stand in your way

[00:25:09] and just do it just do it. What do you think was the switch that flipped on you from saying no no no

[00:25:16] to yes? Honestly I feel like it's I just had enough of struggling because like I said I

[00:25:28] went to school for acting which I knew going into it that there was like a minus one percent

[00:25:33] chance of making it and I knew that going into it so I knew the fear and the risk involved

[00:25:38] but I was struggling day in day out going on audition after audition getting rejection

[00:25:43] after rejection and I had finally had enough of it and I was doing survival jobs to make ends

[00:25:49] meet like waitress I was a birthday party clown I've done it all and I finally had enough of

[00:25:55] struggling and little did I know owning a business there's a lot of struggle involved

[00:26:01] but I just finally had enough of that struggle so I said okay yes let's let's just do it and

[00:26:07] in my mind it was going to be a little side hustle like I said and then word of mouth took

[00:26:11] off and it blew up and again I'm so thankful that it did but I think I was just I just

[00:26:17] said enough I said let's let's surrender and let's try this thing who knows. Awesome love

[00:26:23] that fearlessness in you by the way. Thank you. So for our listeners do you have anything

[00:26:31] coming up next anything for our listeners to keep an eye out for? I know you have a podcast

[00:26:37] as well right? Yes I do have a podcast with my business partner Holly we do everything together

[00:26:43] it's called Hustled Up Podcast and we just recently switched to video podcasting so we'll

[00:26:49] be posting everything to YouTube and to Spotify and Apple Podcasts and all those things so

[00:26:54] that's the big project for us right now. Awesome and we'll make sure that we put in

[00:26:58] the show notes links out to their podcast and your social media handles as well in

[00:27:03] case any of our listeners want to get in touch with you. So I just want to thank you for being

[00:27:09] a guest on the Fearlessness Podcast and for our listeners if you want to find more episodes

[00:27:14] you can visit thefearlessness.com or you can also find them on my personal webpage website

[00:27:20] which is libbyd.com and so guys that's a wrap into the heart of fearlessness.

[00:27:25] Remember that every step we take is a move towards our own strengths and courage.

[00:27:30] Keep walking through those fires because on the other side lies a version of yourself that's

[00:27:34] unstoppable. I'm Libby reminding you to embrace your fearlessness until next time stay brave

[00:27:40] stay bold and keep pushing forward.